"I Was There To Hear Your Borning Cry"
It begins with melodic yet majestic chords of the organ. After just watching the baptism of a small infant, the congregation pulls out the hymnal from the back of the pew and flips to page 300. Their eyes begin to skim the words as the organ continues to play. They open their mouths to come in. "I was there to hear your borning cry, I was there when you were born, I rejoiced to see you baptized, to see your life unfold." The melody falls in the first stanza, rises in the next; each word is its own note. So simple. Yet so elegant.Since I first remember, we sang this song in church for almost every infant baptismal. There is something about seeing a baby, a cute and tiny child of God, just officially welcomed into the church. When we all confirm our support to raise him or her, we are opening our arms. We are bringing the baby into our family. On one level, this song represents that. It is saying how we will be there to see the child grow, develop, and struggle through the faith. We will be there for the celebration and the depression. We will be there for everything.
As a child, that is all I took it as. It was comfort. It was reassurance. Yet as I grew older, I understood the deeper level. Of how this song represented our walk with Christ. It says, "I was there to hear your borning cry," but it also says "I'll be there when you are old." It talks about aging and death, and how Christ and God will always be there for you. No matter what demons you may face. In this further case, that is another reassurance. It is a humbling yet relieving feeling that He will always be there.
Yet at the same time, the song has moved me to tears, and not just tears of joy. It became a bittersweet experience after my grandma died. A week after her funeral, we had a baptism in our church. The hymn was this one, and as I began singing, all the memories of my grandma came back to me. I should have been happy. She was safe and at peace in heaven with God. Still it shook me. The words "When the evening gently closes in, and you shut your weary eyes, I'll be there as I've always been, with just one more surprise" made me cry. It just reminded me too much of her: her life, her love and her own journey with Christ. While at first, it made me sad that she was gone, for a little bit it also brought anger. I could not understand why God would have made her suffer or why he would take from this world. Eventually that emotion subsided, but the song still reminds me all of these experiences. All the demons that everyone has to face.
In this way it is amazing that such a beautiful and simple song can evoke so many different emotions. It reminds me of death but also re-beginnings. Similar to the birth of a child. It reminds you of how precious life is, how horrid the loss of loved one, and yet the infinite joy of bringing a new loved one into your family.
Wow, I really loved that the music you focused in on was church music. That's something so emotionally linked to memories and words of inspiration yet does not often come to mind when thinking of songs that we value and love. I really enjoyed your sense of honesty in your writing and your links to the beginning of a life as well as the end of your Grandmother's. I was just at a baptism today and I must say that the whole ceremony is a special one and the congregation's songs help to make it so beautiful.
ReplyDeleteDoes this song still remind you of your grandmother or was it just the timing that got you to make that connection? I really enjoyed this blog! Nice job!
Thank you! Yeah, church music is so beautiful and yet really simple to play and sing . . . It's amazing.
DeleteI believe it probably was more the timing of the song that made me really connect the song to her. I don't know if there had been a baptism 6 months after her death whether I would have made the connection, but being so soon after, I still had her funeral in mind. So I definitely believe timing had a role in it.
I think it's great what a connection you have to that song. Hymns and songs similar to them really have a sort of timeless quality to them, which is why they stick around for hundreds of years.
ReplyDeleteI wonder specifically what about hymns make them endure through time. Is it merely the message? Is there an endearing quality in the simplicity that you mention?
From "O Christmas Tree" to "Hey Jude," there are certain songs that have a quality that makes them stick around. What are the connections between these different types of songs that makes them last?
E,
ReplyDeleteThis has flashes of true essaying excellence. I wonder, though, can we know more about your life-of-faith in this piece? You write touchingly and trustingly of Jesus, but what is this particular community of believers?
On grief and the emotions of music, I wonder if you can go a bit further. Some of the assertions--pardon me for this--seem too universal, if such a thing exists. My favorite parts are the opening scene, the description of the music, and the explanation of what you're all promising at a baptism (with my daughter's coming up in a month, I'm certainly thinking about community in a similar way).
That said, instead of writing about imprecise demons, I think you ought to revise with specifics in mind, with a true sense of your own faith, perhaps your doubts, and an intentional structure that makes the best use of the song and its lyrics.
This is really strong and can have a life beyond the post. Let's talk.
DW